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The Fantasy In My Head

05 Mar

By Gil Gonzalez

Random Writers: Write about what you want most out of life.

In my future fantasy world, I’m sitting on a plane – first class, of course – when the person next to me engages in conversation.

“So, are you going to New York for business or pleasure?”

<slight hesitation> “Ummm … a little bit of both.”

<curious look> “Really? Do you care to elaborate?”

“I’m killing two birds with one stone. I am meeting up with friends in New York, but I also have some work to do.”

“Oh. What kind of work do you do?”

<irritatingly large smile> “I’m a writer. I’m going to Manhattan for a book signing.”

Yes, that’s the conversation I have with my imaginary travel companion every time I think about what I want most out of life. Well, when I think about the personal, selfish version of that question.

In reality, what I want most out of life is for my children to grow up healthy and happy, and to see them realize all their goals and dreams. That’s perfection for me. But if I allow myself to indulge in a personal fantasy, it has to be receiving a paycheck – a big, substantial paycheck – for something that I wrote.

It’s a fine line, however, given that writing for me is fun. It started as therapy that metamorphosed into a hobby. It began as something in which I dabbled and evolved into something I can call much more concrete than that. Still, writing has never been a job nor the source of my livelihood. My mundane, corporate-world, 8-5 job takes care of that for me.

Instead, writing has been a recent ambition of mine. One where I can fantasize about sitting behind a table, meeting new people, and signing my name until my wrist falls off. Of course, in my fantasy world I look less like me and more like Richard Castle, but that’s neither here nor there.

Having self-published two short novels – and completing the third in that series – was a great experience for me. Having never written anything like that before, it was so amazing to receive such great feedback from my friends and family. It opened my eyes to the reality that God did grace me with a modicum of writing talent, and if applied properly, I could produce something someone else might find interesting to read.

Still, the realities of day-to-day life provide the perfect series of excuses for not pursuing, and ultimately not fulfilling, those dreams. “I’ll try to find some time to write tomorrow.” I’ve been saying that to myself for about a year and a half now.

So maybe I’m putting the cart before the proverbial horse. In thinking about all the things I allow to keep me from writing, perhaps the one thing I want most out of life is to have the dedicated time to invest in my writing, an effort that could one day possibly lead to my fantasy scenario on a plane.

Dedicated time for writing? Now THAT’S a fantasy!

 

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Posted by on March 5, 2012 in Gil Gonzalez, Prompts

 

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